Nine raisins a day keep Teresa at bay, updated



From the looks of it, Kerry’s been folowing his wife’s advice and eats nine raisins to stay nimble: “You get some gin and get some white raisins — and only white raisins — and soak them in the gin for two weeks,” she said. “Then eat nine of the raisins a day.” She calls this “a highly effective” remedy for arthritis, and there were two doctors in the house that backed her up:

Despite the laughter, Dr. Steven Phillips, director of Geriatric Medicine at the University of Nevada quickly supported the prescription.

Phillips, on stage with Heinz Kerry as part of the panel, said sulfur and sulfides found in grapes are increased by the alcohol and could perhaps alleviate joint pain.

Dr. Michael Gerber, a noted homeopathic doctor in Reno, also said the formula has merit.

No one specified how much gin it’ll take for the arthritic to feel no pain. The campaign remains true to itself, though, since, having a candidate for VP who made his fortune with junk science, now the proposed first lady also touts junk science.

In slightly more serious business, Betsy comments that Teresa’s pretending to release her tax information. Tax Prof Blog points out that Ms. Heinz Kerry released just the front two pages of Form 1040, as did Senator John & Elizabeth Edwards. Teresa can afford a lot of raisins, though,

No information was provided about how much income was earned by trusts of which she is the beneficiary. If the trusts are as large as reported – and the Kerry campaign has not challenged the billion dollar estimate – then even a modest 5 percent return would have generated $50 million of income, 10 times what was on the two pages released by Ms. Heinz Kerry. A statement released by the Kerry campaign noted that income taxes are paid directly by the Heinz family trust, in addition to taxes that Ms. Heinz Kerry pays.

Apparently Ms Heinz Kerry, whose tax returns identify her only as Teresa Heinz will get $247,933 or so in tax refunds. She elected to apply the overpayment to this year’s income tax, rather than getting a refund check sent in the mail.

While all of this makes for good blogging material, I can’t help but think that a Kerry administration will only lead the country to one thing:

Udpate, Sunday Oct. 17 With the candidate still wearing his Col. Mustard jacket (in tune with other condiments), the Kerry campaign continues its current produce theme. Mercifully, no footballs appear to have been tossed, at least while in the presence of photographers.